If you don’t know the song referenced in the title, it’s likely that you’re stupid and bought one of these:

 
In today’s automotive world, gas prices greatly impact our driving behavior. The most prominent of these impacts can be seen when it comes to our choices about what cars we purchase. A great deal of emphasis is set on buying hybrids, but is it really cost beneficial to go green? Furthermore, is there anything that can be done to improve gas mileage altogether? Grab your calculator and pencil; there is probably going to be some big surprises in store.

The Toyota Prius the leading hybrid on the market. Though there are now alternatives, Toyota managed to release a hybrid before any of the competition and they now virtually control the entire hybrid market. This was absolutely brilliant marketing, as the Prius is not only cost-effective, but it is also more environmentally friendly than any other gas-guzzler on the road. At the same time, the Ford F150 has experienced its worst slump in Ford’s long history. Dealerships are marking the old powerhouses well below $12,000, and this has all to do with the cost of oil. These markdowns are not even a product of supply and demand anymore, but rather, dealerships are having great difficulty getting them off their lots, and they are simply minimizing their loss. So what does that mean for the end consumer? Alarms should be going off in everyone’s head that perhaps this gas crisis may be a blessing in disguise.

How might you ask? It is time to get out your pencil and calculator.

A Toyota Prius mid-end package will set back the consumer a whopping $22,500, and as stated earlier, the Ford F150 (fully-loaded, with navigation) will cost someone in my neck of the woods a meager $11,888. According to the Department of Energy, Americans drive an average twelve-thousand miles every year, and when the Prius averages a 46mpg, and the F150 gulps an average 17mpg, it becomes easy to see why demand is falling off. But never fear, my utility-loving friends! Perhaps there is good news in sight. Assuming gas will stay around $4 per gallon, the average F150 is going to consume $2823.53 in fuel each year, whereas the Prius will consume a meager $1043.48 in gasoline. That means the savvy “investment” in the Prius actually costs the consumer significantly more than its gas guzzling counterpart. As a matter of fact, the Prius will not cover the differential until six years after the initial purchase, but that’s not all the Prius has going against it.

Not only does the Prius lack a fully-loaded package, the utility of a truck bed, and space for someone taller than a midget, but it also lacks performance. Now it may seem a bit obvious to compare a utility vehicle to a frugal vehicle, but the simple presence of low-end torque and horsepower means that the truck does not need to work as hard to get to speed, and it can also do so much faster. With that simple principle stated, one could then presume that a Ford F150 driving with the same rate of acceleration as a Prius would actually perform better than an F150 driving under normal conditions. Of course the Prius driver can also dampen their lead foot proportionally to the truck, but such driving would literally require almost a half a minute to get to highway speeds.

Truly, the better deal belongs to the truck. It is absolutely inconceivable that anyone would go out and purchase a Prius when the average truck dealer is practically paying people to take luxury-class trucks off their hands. A few dealers and manufacturers are even offering to pay for gas! Don’t let the misapprehension of overbearing gas prices alter your decision-making. There are some amazing deals out there, and they are not very difficult to find in this pandemonius world.