Dude. So, like… it’s sort of hard to describe exactly how incroyable today has been. Yeah, yeah — 24 Hours of LeMons, hella-cheating $500 race cars grenading their trannies and head gaskets, humiliating penalties, the most unkosher food ever, blah, blah, etc. But, all that’s old hat. See, we had the boys (and fine ladies) from the 2009 Babe Rally — $500 rally cars “race” from the Big Apple to the Big Easy — show up and we dragged ‘em!!! Seriously, full on, flat out, Christmas tree startin’ drag racing. We wanted to do it for pinks — where the losing car had to take the other car’s pink slip, but sadly the Babe cars had to drive back to New Jersey. Anyhow, as you may have guessed, the LeMons cars kicked the poncy snot out of the Babe cars. In fact, what you’re seeing up top is the only LeMons car to lose to a Babe Rally car — and the RX7 only had one working rotor! Jump.

Ah, well now, here’s your standard LeMons issue “Dude, I swear we’re not cheating!” built 240Z totally dusting a Babe Plymouth Volaré with the hood, trunk and rear doors pulled off (serious drag racers only, please). And by “totally dusting” I mean the Datsun ripped off at least a 16.5 to the Plymouth’s 19.889.

It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows (and well ventilated blocks) at the strip. Sadly, a lot of LeMons teams decided to take the actual race seriously — they just didn’t want to risk damaging their “precious” $500 pieces of Bondo and J-B Weld so they didn’t even go drag racing. Not the Babes. More than half of them went racing, because… why not? In fact, that’s Judge Martin hanging his arm out the window of a 1973 Lincoln Continental Mark IV during a 17.8 blast of glory. Can I get a “dang?”

And why stop with LeMons/Babe cars? Why not let our buddy Marc Sketchler drag his Prius against a really ratty Pontiac Grand Prix with a full-on ghetto J-B Weld head gasket job? I can’t think of a single reason. Oh, and the Pontiac whipped the Toyota to the tune of 15 point something to slow,whirring hybridal sound of 17.6.

What do you do with a 19 second Volaré? Find something it can beat up on. Check out that thing. It’s kinda Toyota-ish (at some point during its life, probably), but Lord only knows now. And it ran a 24 second quarter-mile with a 54 mph trap. Which was almost the slowest time of the day, if not for the one-rotor RX-7 managing a 26 second run. One of the many “best parts” was that no one really cared about the dude on the 8.9 second bike with the 156 mph trap or the nitrous-venting, 800 wheel-horsepower Camaro that ran in the 10s. Nope, all cheering was for LeMons vs. Babe. Long story short — you have no idea what y’all missed.